THE COMPLETE ORACLE (1989-1991)
How to read all 43 “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” in Chronological Order
My college article “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” is how everything really began for me. Sure, I spent an inordinate amount of time in my childhood and teen bedroom pounding away at my manual typewriter (and some of those writings may just find their way to this Archive as well), but The Oracle was the first time I had a real readership, meaningful deadlines, and intense pressure amid an already demanding schedule. The first time I was asked to lend my perspective, my words, to anything at all.
Now, all 43 iterations of “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” are here in the Mark Steele Archive as they were first written and published between Autumn 1989 and Spring 1991 - in their entirety and able to be read in chronological order.
The truth is, these essays will likely be as embarrassing as they are humorous. I honestly don’t know as, of this moment, I have committed to landing them on this Archive without having revisited them in over three decades. But, they should be insightful. Not to any mature sort of wisdom, but insightful into my writing process.
If I felt compelled to add or clarify anything at all, I have done so in Author’s Notes & Endnotes included in parentheticals at the beginning and / or end of each essay.
My alma mater is Oral Roberts University in Tulsa, Oklahoma - an oft misunderstood and maligned institution, even among other people of faith. I had a strong desire to write for the College newspaper from the onset, but my understanding was that the experience was reserved for Journalism majors. I had a Writing minor, which at least put me on the map, but it was a request made in my sophomore year that gave birth to the reality. I was asked to keep a journal of my experience portraying the role of the Stage Manager in the February 1989 production of Thornton Wilder’s “Our Town” and then translate that journal into a feature article to be released the week of the show’s debut. I relished the experience, but assumed it would end with a one-off. The piece was well-received and, when I returned at the top of my Junior year, I was invited into the club to be an entertainment writer by my wing-mate (and then Entertainment Editor) Randy Robison. I wrote weekly for just about all of the remaining two years of my college career.
An enormous thanks to Randy Robison, for basically kickstarting my entire career with a small dose of friendly trust. He is a great writer, and I will be forever grateful for him inviting me into the experience and convincing David Morken & Mark Wells to take a chance on my ridiculous non-journalism approach. Special thanks also go out to David & Mark themselves for not only tolerating the experiment, but helping me to strengthen my writings from week to week.
For a publication coming out of a faith-based institution, I was given very little oversight and rarely scrutinized with only a handful of too-vulgar-for-school turns of phrases removed. That is, until March 23, 1990. You’ll see.
At the age of nineteen (wow), the only thing I knew to write about were my own experiences from a slightly askew angle. This is what I did 43 times. Many of you were there, and you may just find yourself name-checked in the article or the Author’s Endnotes.
In September of 1990, both to my shock and chagrin, my English 301 professor Dr. Ruth Givens told me that she always split her advanced class’ semester into two writers for the students to read, study, and critique. For that senior fall semester, she decided the first half of the semester would be dedicated to John Steinbeck and the second half would be dedicated to me: Mark Steele. For real. The class would dissect, discuss, and attempt to improve my weekly column. Once I got over the humiliation of such an effort, it became one of the most adventurous and expanding four months of my career development. The class was more than fair, balancing positive and negative feedback and helping me come up with real solutions where my writing inevitably wandered.
In fairness to myself, I received no school credit or pay for writing these articles, so composing them had to come after my studies, rehearsals, and homework were complete for the week in question. At times, I was deeply inspired. At others, clueless and exhausted. To this end, it is likely that the quality wanes. But, it was the best baptism-by-fire I could have ever received to writing well and from the heart on an insane deadline. We’ll see, won’t we. To this end, here’s hoping you can actually observe the evolution of my skills. From the very birth of where I would attempt to make a career all the way to the point when that career officially began as a college graduate.
In order to read all of the essays in chronological order, simply click onto the next essay’s link as it appears at the end of each essay (for instance, the underlined title of the “Fallacies of a Fashionable Freshman” essay at the bottom of the page). Enjoy.
HYPERLINKS TO EACH ARTICLE (In Chronological Order):
Autumn 1989:
FALLACIES OF A FASHIONABLE FRESHMAN - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 102: Sept. 7, 1989
FRENCH SILK & THE COMMITMENT INVOLVED - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 103: Sept. 14, 1989
YOU CANNOT RELY ON JAMES DEAN & NON-STICK SURFACES - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 104: Sept. 21, 1989
IN SEARCH OF TRUE HUMOR AND A DECIPHERABLE SAGA COOKIE BAR - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 105: Sept. 28, 1989
DOLLAR MOVIE ETIQUETTE: FROLIC OR FRENZY? - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 106: Oct. 5, 1989
GET YOUR ROOMMATE A DATE: AN ADVENTURE IN FEAR - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 107: Oct. 12, 1989
CONFIDENTIALITY & BACKSEAT ADVICE: A SCENARIO - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 108: Oct. 19, 1989
MEXICO (PT. 1): VALE' LA PENA & THE STARLINGS - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 109: Nov. 2, 1989
MEXICO (PT. 2): PARADISE LOST IN TRANSLATION - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 110: Nov. 9, 1989
RESIDENT WRITER UNWITTINGLY STAKES HIS LIFE ON LARGE TYLENOL WITH WINGS - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 111: Nov. 16, 1989
FROM DIAPERS TO DUST: 50 THINGS FOR WHICH I AM THANKFUL - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 112: Nov. 30, 1989
Spring 1990:
A RETROSPECT OF THE EIGHTIES - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 113: Jan. 26, 1990
A LITTLE EXTRA TIME ON MY HANDS FOR THE NEW YEAR - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 114: Feb. 2, 1990
I HAVE TOUCHED THE MAN WHO WOULD BE KING - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 115: Feb. 9, 1990
UPON TEARING THE WINGS OFF OF CUPID - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 116: Feb. 16, 1990
MEANINGFUL CONVERSATIONS WITH A 2-YEAR-OLD CHILD - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 117: Feb. 23, 1990
I HAVEN'T A CLUE WHAT TO WRITE ABOUT THIS WEEK - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 118: March 2, 1990
STAGE-KISSING & THE MARCH OF THE AGNOSTIC FLEAS - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 119: March 9, 1990
THE PROS & CONS OF AUTO TRAVEL & SHOE POLISH - Never Published, but Intended for The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 1XX: March 23, 1990
AUTHORS & OTHERS UNDER THE SUNSET - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 120: March 29, 1990
Autumn 1990:
ADVENTURING THE JOURNEY OF LIFE ON A HONDA - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 201: Aug. 23, 1990
THE FIRST & LAST SEMI-ANNUAL FRESTIONAIRE - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 202: Aug. 30, 1990
WAITRESSING & OTHER FORMS OF SELF-GOVERNMENT - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 203: Sept. 6, 1990
IN SEARCH OF DISCO-CLOGGING & SOMETHING TO SAY - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 204: Sept. 13, 1990
AN AVERAGE DAY IN THE LIFE OF A WING CHAPLAIN - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 205: Oct. 11, 1990
A PRAYER UPON GROWING TIRED - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 206: Oct. 25, 1990
ON INTELLECT vs. LEARNING or APPRECIATING THE IANOTTI -Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 207: Nov. 8, 1990
A CRASH COURSE IN BRANCH-LEAPING & EFFECTIVE AUGGHING - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 208: Nov. 15, 1990
50 MORE THINGS FOR WHICH I AM THANKFUL - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 209: Nov. 20, 1990
THE PERIHELION CROSSOVER (Not by Robert Ludlum) - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 210: Dec. 6, 1990
SOMETHING GOOD IS BOUND TO HAPPEN AT THE MALL - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 211: Dec. 13, 1990
Spring 1991:
LOOKING THROUGH THE EYES OF HEAVEN - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 212: Jan. 24, 1991
A BOWLER'S GUIDE TO FREE POSTAGE - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 213: Jan. 31, 1991
THE KING OF WISHFUL THINKING - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 214: Feb. 7, 1991
PREVIEWS OF COMING ATTRACTIONS - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 215: Feb. 21, 1991
STUDENT ELECTION: YOUR UNOFFICIAL GUIDE TO WRITE-IN CANDIDATES! - Never Published, Intended for The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 2XX: Feb. 28, 1991
FUTURE IMPERFECT - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 216: March 7, 1991
ASK DR. NOWHERE: AN ENCYCLOPEDIA OF KNOWLEDGE - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 217: March 14, 1991
MY MISTRESS EYES ARE NOTHING LIKE THE SUNTAN - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 218: March 28, 1991
THE FINE LINE BETWEEN WHAT IS REAL AND WHAT IS MICKEY - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 219: April 4, 1991
WHEN AN ARTICLE HITS MIDDLE AGE... - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 220: April 11, 1991
INTEGRITY: A LAST LETTER - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 221: April 18, 1991
THE GREAT LOST ART OF SAYING GOODBYE - Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 222: April 25, 1991
Too many options? Start at the beginning with this link…
Next: FALLACIES OF A FASHIONABLE FRESHMAN (From the Archive) Originally published in The Oracle’s “Notes from the Middle of Nowhere” 101: Sept. 7, 1989